We Be… Corporate Thuggin!
Oct 31, 2009 crime, music, sex, uncategorized
Hopefully you are familiar with the classic “Straight Outta Compton” by N.W.A. I certainly am, which is why I used the beat in a song I wrote explaining who we are and what we’re all about…in case you didn’t know already.
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Special thanks to White Collar Crime for spittin’ this dope rhyme wit me.
Update 11/1/2009 9:22 AM
Per multiple requests, I have posted the lyrics. Now you can sing along!
“Corporate Thuggin”
Corporate Thuggin crazy motherfucker Lil Biznas Planz
Pounding Whiskey, doin one handed keg stands
Im one of many, we roll deep
With Forever 21 and Crackers with Cheese
White Collar Crime, He’ll make you chuckle
Beat ya ass with briefcases and brass knuckles
Want a reason to be scared? There’s a myriad.
We mean like tigers and Invincible Period
You think you tough son? That’s a fable
Here comes our newest Mr. I brought the table
We representing the mean streets of Boston
spitting rhymes that yo’ ass will get lost in
So now its time to give up ya game
You keep on tryin, ya ass will get slain
We drink enough to get white people dancing
with crime records like Charles Manson
Target practice in Maine, that’s a rule
Don’t make us act a motherfuckin fool
We’ll try and fuck your girl, no maybe
we slamming other bitches boxes, daily
yo weekly, monthly and yearly
until you dumb motherfuckers see clearly
that we’re down with the U S of A
All other countries are GAY
So when we’re in your neighborhood, you better duck
At Corporate Thuggin we crazy as fuck
As we leave, your shoulders be shruggin
but when we come back, boy We be corporate thuggin
Chorus:
[Corporate Thuggin’, Thuggin.]
[Lil Biznas Planz] White Collar Crime
[White Collar Crime] Whassup?
[Lil Biznas Planz] Tell em what you are!
Verse Two:(White Collar Crime)
I’m Corporate Thuggin, another crazy ass blogger
Yo is that your girl, I’m gonna shnaug her
We be corporate in the day and you know this
While you non thuggin faggots drink your own piss
But we don’t give a fuck, we bang out sluts
If not in their box we, put it in their butts
I know we’re a crew and right now I’m going solo
I’ll do a drive by while wearing a pink polo
Program a spreadsheet in a minute
Then I find a good piece o’ pussy, and go up in it
There better be some motherfucking penetration
Even if there’s a little menstration
You probably think that’s gross and kinda rude,
I know for a fact blood makes good lube
Im a crazy muthafucker from tha street
Follow us on Twitter Corporate Thuggin Tweet Tweet
I’m White Collar Crime I control the automatic
For any dumb muthafucker that starts actin like a faggot
We’re stronger than the Bloods, Tougher than the Crypts
I walk in the office and the girls rub their clits
Business Casual in the day? Yo that’s a law
When its time to start thuggin we break ya jaw
So What If I act a little Cocky?
What can I say, at least I don’t like Hockey!
We roll together we’re a crew
And once you’re on the scope, your ass is through
Not my fault you ain’t in yo prime
You just got served by White Collar Crime
We Corporate Thuggin
Chorus:
[Corporate Thuggin, Thuggin.]
[White Collar Crime] Lil Biznas Planz the name and the boy be
Corporate Thuggin!
And a brotha that’ll buttufuck yo’ mother
and make ya sister think I love her
I like all bitches, don’t split em into segements
Look at em the right way, and get em’ pregnant
What can I say I’m a bad mortherfucker
I’ll beat ya ass while I’m wearing seersucker
I’ll make a bitch straight, who once was a dyke
Before you know it she’s goin solo on my mic
At Corporate Thuggin, This is how we roll
We fuck shit up enough where it hurts your soul
You think we bad? You think we crooks?
We may be brothers but our favorite is Brooks
We make jokes about periods and jews
We carry glock nine’s but we wear boat shoes
You’re thinking by now Corporate Thuggin’s a paradox
You’ll stop thinking that when you see our huge cocks
After all these dope rhymes, yo’ ass be luggin
That’s what happens when you mess with Corporate Thuggin
Tags: drinking, Gangsta, Gettin' After It, NWA, Thuggin, Vaginas
Reader Testimony
Oct 30, 2009 uncategorized
“My firm doesn’t block any websites except corporate thuggin….in which it categorizes it as pornography”
<3 A Loyal Reader From NYC
…Keep On Thuggin’
That Kid From Twilight Loves Labias
Oct 30, 2009 celebrities, internet, movie, sex, she could get it
I figured that there were panties featuring the face of that guy from the Twilight movies, but this product went a step further and put that guys mouth facing the labias of the vagina. We are known for our period jokes at Corporate Thuggin’, but this just seemed too easy. I feel like the equivalent of this product for guys would be a Kristen Stewart sex doll, yeah I’d be in.
Tags: coochie lips, kristen stewart, Labia, panties, robert pattinson, sex, sex doll, sex toys, Twilight, vampires
Girl Loves Miley, Girls Hates Cats, If Miley Doesn’t Go Back Twitter, Girl Will Eat Her Cat
Oct 29, 2009 celebrities, crime, freaks, idiots, internet
The headline pretty much spells this one out for you. Some girl is threatening Miley Cyrus and the world in general that she will kill and eat her cat, Fuzzy, if Miley doesn’t start tweeting gain. This girl’s pretty fucked up, she’s got a cat recipe. This girl is obviously a future serial killer, but I kind of want to see if she goes through with it. I’m guessing she’ll puss out. Prove me wrong bitch.
Tags: animal killing, cat, cats, girl, miley, miley cyrus, murder, twitter
The Office Music Video, “Male Prima Donna,” Featuring The New Girl and Kelly Kapoor
Oct 29, 2009 celebrities, internet, music, video
I read about the making of this music video the other day and was pumped to see it cause it features my second favorite Indian of all-time, Mindy Kaling. This is “The Office” music video to “Male Prima Donna.” I didn’t think it was that funny but that new girl on the show, who was in that Derrick Comedy blowjob video, made me want to take my pants off.
Tags: blowjob, indians, kelly kapoor, male prima donna, mindy kaling, music, music video, the office
A Few Examples Women Getting Owned
Oct 29, 2009 celebrities, crime, freaks, idiots, internet, music, photo, video
You might realize that I said “owned” and not “pwned,” that’s because I’m not a queer. In other news, I’ve been doing my usual trip around the internet to look for some funny stuff and I’ve come across an unusual amount of examples of women getting their shit handed to them. Here are a few examples of what I’m talking about.
1. This is a video of Melissa Joan Hart of Clarissa Explains It All and Sabrina the Teenage Witch fame. She is currently on Dancing with the Stars and is featured in an interview with the great Jimmy Kimmel. Kimmel just destroys her in the clip after she tries to get a little sassy. She just seems like a hot girl from high school who just stays bitchy and gets less hot with every passing year.
2. By now you’ve probably seen the pictures of Taylor Swift with some kid and a swastika. The story behind the picture is probably that this kid is just a douche, but our sweetheart Taylor needs to watch out for this because she pretty much looks like the prototypical Aryan.
3. I saw this on Warming Glow and couldn’t stop laughing after the line of “Acid, Bitch,” I assume you’ll do the same.
Tags: aryans, clarissa explains it all, dancing, dancing with the stars, douchebags, jimmy kimmel, melissa joan hart, sabrina the teenage witch, swastika, Taylor Swift
Staying Connected
Oct 28, 2009 advertisment, internet
Want to read Corporate Thuggin’ posts but don’t want to keep checking the site to see what is new? This is how you can stay connected:
Email – Get nightly emails containing the posts of the past 24 hours
Twitter – Get post updates and see what we can do in just 140 characters
Facebook -See us in your New Feed, Live Feed, or whatever the book changes it to next
How to Survive College – Part 6
Oct 28, 2009 college, freaks, idiots, internet, photo, she could get it
Join student groups with people that have the same morals and beliefs:
Northeastern Students for Choice was the talk of the CT staff for most of the afternoon. Join their email list by sending a message to nuprochoice@gmail.com, or find their group on facebook. There they have some special photos (dildo party at conors, girls that never had an actual penis inside them):
To find a full list of communist organizations, most schools will post their Special Interest Groups. They are usually found around campus complaining about how student activity fee money is spent and wondering why no one wants to go to their Sickle Cell Fashion Show. Some groups to consider at NU are:
Asian1N1
Oct 28, 2009 uncategorized
An Asian sent this to me, of course. I don’t agree with it though. There are already far too many of them; I say let the H1N1 take its course. Natural Selection. Same with the Mexican’ts.
