Corporate Thuggin'

Archive for February, 2010

Inside the life of a sorority girl

Feb 24, 2010 uncategorized

Can’t believe no one told me about this application before. Facebook has an application called Sorority Life where you can basically pretend to be a sorority girl and do things like slut it up, throw it down, spend money on stupid clothes, and ruin peoples lives. I was going to start a little series of posts on the life of the fake sorority girl I created (her name is Ridesalottacox), but then I realized how fucking stupid this application is.

Since this is a Facebook game it has to be real life, which teaches me that all sorority girls do is socialize, go to the bank, start fights, go to the spa, put on makeup, fingerblast (under the My Self tab)…and I’m assuming the Jobs tab is referencing those of the hand and blow variety. But one of the best things about this is that if you actually look at the jobs the girls are eligible for you will see that they can only be dog walkers or dining hall assistants (apparently even Starbucks is outta their league?).

This game really is retarded. I’ll just go back to watching girls bitchslap each other for the last cock standing at last call.

Designated Driver

Feb 23, 2010 celebrities, internet, tv, video

Probably because it is on HBO, I can’t find a full clip of this, but check out Funny Or Die Presents, episode one, the Designated Driver clip. It shows why I could never live as an adult with Forever 21 in the same city. (Paul Scheer = Cracker with Cheese, Rob Riggle = Forever 21). This short clip will not make any sense as to why, you need to watch it on HBO on demand:

Designated Driver: Donuts w/ Paul Scheer & Rob Riggle from FODPresents

Tags: cracker with cheese, forever 21, funny or die presents, hbo, Paul Scheer, Rob Riggle

Ruckas

Feb 20, 2010 video

These are pretty funny. Better than most of the billerica videos.

Untitled from ruck two on Vimeo.

Don’t Be A Playa, Haiti from rucka ali on Vimeo.

Untitled from ruck two on Vimeo.

Untitled from rucka ali on Vimeo.

Star of Blank Check Arrested Again

Feb 20, 2010 celebrities, crime, movie, news, pop culture, tv, video

Man, this kid got really fucked up. Mr. Macintosh’s money must have went straight to his head.

Tags: blank check, brian bonsall, child star, crime, family ties, film, movie, tv

This Movie Is Like Blow, Except About Porn

Feb 20, 2010 celebrities, internet, movie, nsfw, pop culture, she could get it, tv, video

I heard about this movie over on filmdrunk, and it was good to hear that Luke Wilson took a break from showing his new and improved extra wide face on att commercials. The movie is called Middle Men and the trailer is definitely not safe for work as it focuses on the rise of internet porn. The only thing you really need to know is the tag line for the film, “Getting In is Easy. Pulling Out is Hard.” Why the fuck couldn’t we come out with a line that good to go with our website, god damn it. After watching this trailer, note that we have a segment called “Things to Jack Off To,” I’m just sayin’.

Tags: film, luke wilson, movie, porn, pussy, redband trailer, tag line, things to jack off to, tits, trailer

This Girl May Be A Bigger Justin Bieber Fan Than Cracker With Cheese

Feb 20, 2010 celebrities, music, pop culture

The funny thing is I caught Cracker with Cheese doing this exact same thing last week.

Tags: crying, justin bieber, music

Where be my reverse seein’ devices??

Feb 19, 2010 uncategorized

So…went to go move my car the other day and something wasn’t quite right. I didn’t remember leaving my mirror on the ground and in multiple pieces. Apparently someone decided the wide open street wasn’t big enough, so they took the mirror clean off my car. Naturally I assumed it was an asian, or a woman, or a pirate ship driven by a guinea pig. Luckily they left a note that cleared everything up:

I’m not sure, but I think this person offered to buy me pitchers at Conor’s. I’m not too worried about the missing mirror – I found something much better to look at while I’m driving drunk…I mean just driving.

Oh, just in case you don’t believe me about the pirate guinea pigs…they’re real:

Entrance Songs For Tiger Woods’ Press Conference

Feb 18, 2010 audio, celebrities, news, pop culture, sex, sports, tv, video

I thought I’d give Tiger a few options for his walk up to the podium for tomorrow’s press conference. The Tiger songs are pretty lame to tell you the truth, but my suggestion for Elin transcends adultery.

Lil Wayne should have just called this one Tiger’s Autobiography

Anything from Three Six Mafia would def instill Tiger’s vibe

Do you think is possible that Tiger plays golf solely for the twat. Fred Durst thinks so. wow, that sentence is lame, but maybe Tiger’s Sunday red is a tribute to ole Freddy.