Super Bowl Commercials
Feb 8, 2010 advertisment, caption contest, celebrities, crime, government, idiots, internet, news, pittsburgh, politics, pop culture, sports, tv, video
Trying to come up with a title for this post was hard, seeing that every internet media blog has taken some variation of “Monday Morning Fill-in-a-term” even though they have no idea what sport reference this is making. ANYWAYS, as a whole I was upset with how unfunny the commercials happened to be this year. And if I see one more Denny’s commercial I will kill someone. You can find all the commercials on YouTube, but to save you time, this is all you need to know:
Best unintentional-intentional comedy that has no business trying to be funny:
Best showing of why Americans think Pittsburgh sucks:
Only commercial that got me to LOL, thanks Lamar:
Commercial that would have been funny if it wasn’t leaked before it aired [FYI - all the Doritos commercials sucked, and when someone at work reminded me that they were submitted to the company by ordinary people it makes me wonder why a they would waste $2.5 million on a spot]:
Most original idea that came from last year’s #1 summer comedy movie:
Best use of taking a popular TV show concept from a non-CBS station:
Worst use of tax money:
Bud Light was the, per usual, best brander this year, they also had the best rap artist joke from 2008:
Finally, the commercial you should watch about 100 times comes from Audi. It gets my M. Night Shyamalan award. To start, I thought it was a take on what America would be about if Al Gore was Prez. Also, for the first 40 seconds it will have you thinking it is a joke on white-collar crime, not to be confused with White-Collar Crime. During this time you may also think it is a joke about white people actually being capable of committing crime. Finally you will see it is about being a hippie:
… I also like this commercial because I play a small part in the financing of it
Tags: Al Gore, Audi, bud light, Census, Commerical, Dennys, doritos, Focus on the Family, hippie, Lamar Odom, Lost, m. night shyamalan, pittsburgh, Super Bowl, T-Pain, The Hangover, Tim Tebow, youtube
More Mom Emails
Jan 23, 2010 government, idiots, internet, news, politics, science, video
Got this today:
Tags: mom email, Nov 2 2010
Weather Channel Ad
Dec 31, 2009 advertisment, caption contest, government, internet, photo
This ad came up for my hour-by-hour forecast:
Tags: Insurance Regulation, jesus, LowerMyBills.com, obama
Obama’s December Rankings Approach Worst Ever
Dec 12, 2009 government, news, politics, science
(at least since the’ve polled).
Gallup today showed Obama’s Job Approval has fallen from near 70% to 50% in the ten months since his inauguration. At that rate, he’ll be at -16% come next election, fuck thats terrible!
They also show that the decrease wasn’t just the Republicans who realized they were idiots in November – almost 1 in 10 Democrats polled no longer expressed approval for Czar (or is it Tsar, Tzar, …) Obama. The fraction was significantly higher on the other side of the isle, however, almost 2 out of 3 Republicans polled no longer expressed approval. Whether this has anything to do with the recent exposure of many “scientists” (including the scum-bag charlatan soon-to-be-former Penn State Professor Michael Mann) colluding to falsify and hide data [Link 2] and manipulate what has turned out to be the basis of all climate change research and policy, is yet unknown.
Lastly, Gallup also shows how previous Presidents have done at the same time in their term. You know, one would think Obama’s would be higher, having just won the Nobel Peace Prize and all, I mean, he had to have done something to get that thing, right?
(All poll graphs retrieved from: http://www.gallup.com/poll/politics.aspx)
Tags: obama
Obama Phone
Dec 5, 2009 advertisment, government, idiots, news, old people, tv, video
Good to know that phone service is now a right for everyone in America.
Live in Massachusetts and participate in one of the following assistance programs?
* Emergency Aid to the Elderly, Disabled and Children
* Supplemental Security Income
* Low Income Home Energy Assistance Program
* Food Stamps
* MassHealth
* Transitional Aid To Families with Dependent Children
* Fuel Assistance
If you do you can get a free phone with monthly minutes!!!
Anderson Cooper, Obama, Jim Norton – How did I miss this?
Nov 16, 2009 government
Actually, Red Eye is pretty legit, pointing out argument ad hominem (definition for the dems, here):
Tags: anderson cooper is gay, cnn, comedy, fox news, obama
@BarackObama
Nov 16, 2009 caption contest, government, idiots, internet, old people, photo, politics
So remember how Obama connected with young voters by being up on technology, well he just said he was lying about it.
While in China, Obama said that his never used his twitter account (which has 2.6 million followers). Speaking to Shanghai students, one asked him “Should we be able to use Twitter freely?” Obama’s response was “Well, first of all, let me say that I have never used Twitter. My thumbs are too clumsy to type in things on the phone.”
Not sure if the students got the hint to make better phones.
What is strange is how everyone made such a big deal about Obama and his love of the BlackBerry. Reports even went out about how he would have to move to the NSA secure Sectera Edge smartphone, coming in with a price tag of $3,350.
What else was Obama doing in Asia land, bowing to midgets:
Tags: blackberry, china, Midget, obama, twitter
“Created or Saved”
Nov 16, 2009 government, she could get it
Obama’s “created or saved” line (referring to jobs created or saved as a result of the stimulus package) received a fair amount of attention because, for one thing, how can one really quantify the amount of jobs saved?
More importantly, however, is the lack of oversight after handing out these grants. It may seem, at first glance, very expensive to check up on all of the grant recipients to ensure that they are spending the money as they said they would, specifically to “create or save” jobs, however after looking at all the money that was given out only to be spent for other things or simply just pocketed, its clear that the cost of oversight would have saved the American taxpayers, well, millions.
Thanks Obama, you’re doing a fucking swell job.
Click through to see the Examiner’s compilation of jobs “created or saved” that, well, weren’t.
I know you’re raging now, so here’s a picture of Avril Lavigne.
Tags: obama
2012
Nov 13, 2009 advertisment, government, idiots, internet, movie, video
One of the problems in the world today is that there are too many retards out there. As shown by Mike Judge with the movie Idiocracy, we are driving toward a future of people getting stupider and stupider. Examples of this in the past year include:
- A man getting elected by winning people over with catchy slogans and false hope
- People giving this man prize after not doing anything (stupid Europeans)
- People think a movie based around cool CGI effects is actually going to happen
That’s right, NASA has created a Frequently Asked Question website for poeple who think the world will end in 2012:
http://www.nasa.gov/topics/earth/features/2012.html
Sounds right for a country that uses commercials like this to get people interested in education:
And other ways of reaching the youth:
Tags: 2012, idiocracy, mike judge, nasa, nobel peace prize, obama, school in pjs
More Mail Today
Oct 7, 2009 government, idiots
I got 11 more Violation Notices from the Massachusetts Turnpike Authority, FAST LANE Violation Processing Center in the mail today. Because you get two violations per trip on the PIKE I expect to get at least one more letter soon. This is a total of 22 violations, which if I was guilty of anything would cost me $1,100. This also brings their administrative fee, for recognizing I have an account, up to $110. I called to speak with someone about this when I got home from work, but their office hours are only from 8 – 5, perfect for people who have jobs.
Looking into all the information I am provided, all the violations occurred over the last two weekends of September, when I was using the PIKE to move stuff between apartments. They give you a good amount of info with each violation, including a picture of your car going through the toll, and the time the “violation” occurs. Knowing this much information has only pissed me off more, because each trip is less than ten minutes from exit to exit.
To understand how fucked over I got by Fast Lane here is some quick math references:
- At a strip club you get charged about $20 per song for a lap dance.
- For the amount of time between tolls I would have been able to hear around 2 songs.
- In this time frame I could have paid a stripper $40 + tip, but instead I got charged $100 for the two violations. $100 for ten minutes should get you a nice girl on girl sex show with salad tossing.
Only in Taxachusetts would they charge you $100 for using their roads for 10 minutes.
Tags: club super sexe, fast lane, mail, stripper, taxachusetts, toastee, violation
